on July 30th 2013
Genres: fantasy, romance
There are some things that really annoy Vervain Lavine. Like when people call her Vivian; “Vervain's an herb, look it up.” Or when people don't get her movie quotes; “Why doesn't anyone appreciate culture anymore?” But what really bothers her, what gets her little witchy panties in a twist, is when gods manipulate humans. “They're not even really gods, just Atlanteans playing dress up!”Yeah, that's right, the gods are Atlanteans. Basically a bunch of refugees who decided to take over. It was a sweet deal for them, at least back when we believed in them and all. Not so much anymore. Nowadays, there ain't too many folks lining up at the altars to give their offerings, and gods are suffering for it. Without our sacrifices, the gods don't have enough juice to keep living in the manner to which they've grown accustomed.So they came up with a plan. It was so easy actually. All they had to do was get us to fight amongst ourselves, go to war. When our kind die, they suck up the energy like a temperature-resistant fat man drinking a milkshake line-up. Not such a bad idea, and it's worked for quite awhile. Up until Vervain found out.Now, don't get the wrong idea. Vervain's no Laura Croft. She can't bench press 200 lbs or shoot laser beams out of her eyes either. She does have magic on her side though and a few little tricks up her sleeve, or up her gloves rather. So she's not completely defenseless and she'll do whatever she has to in order to end this threat of divine proportions. Even if it means assassinating one god at a time.Her greatest annoyance is yet to come though, in the form of a gorgeous Viking God who swears he's on her side. If she can keep her eyes off his leather pants long enough, they might even stand half a chance.
This is my first ever DNF review on Great Imaginations, and I’m pretty much scared, let me admit that HAHAH. *side-eyes everyone* Okay, I rarely DNF a book usually, unless the book has a horrrrible main character. I really really HATE it when the main character is badly written, because it will ruin the whole story line for me. Currently, I am having this very very strong urge to RANT OUT everything wrong with this book, but I shall calm myself down and instead list the FIVE reasons as to why I DNF-ed this book.
FIVE REASONS AS TO WHY I BOYCOTT THIS BOOK
Reason ONE: The main character. DEFINITELY the main character. I do not like cocky, irritating main characters who are full of themselves. The first paragraph of this book made me roll my eyes SO HARD that I nearly fell backwards. LIKE ugh, excuse me, no PLEASE. Since this book was in a first-person view, it made it even more worse, because I was stuck with the MC’s arrogant thoughts. I was just there like, Oh my Goddddddddd.
Reason TWO: It was pretty long. I used a Kindle to read this e-book, and the reading speed showed that this book would take 5 HOURS to read. And my average reading time is 2 hours, so IMAGINE HOW THICK THIS BOOK IS. Are you kidding me? There’s no way I’m going to force myself to read a book about someone SO ANNOYING for 5 freaking hours. *chucks Kindle aside*
Reason THREE: Leather pants. EEEEK. I mean, I know this book is about all the mythology gods or something like that. But THIS IS THE 21st CENTURY. Nobody wears bloody tight leather pants that makes you wanna rip it off anymore. Okay, maybe they do. But come on, listening to MC’s horny thoughts about that leather pants make me wanna strangle myself. PLEASE.
Reason FOUR: I TRIED okay? I wanted to DNF this book at 4% but I forced myself to keep on reading, BUT OH MY GOD, IT WAS DRAGGY. Like, there were REALLY unnecessary details for a few pages, and I’m just there like, must I know about this information? MUST I? And it didn’t pick up speed, at all. KILL. ME. NOW.
Reason FIVE: There are more than 15 books in this series. OH MY GOD. NOOO. How can there be 15 freaking books about this? *shuts down laptop* After reading the 15th book’s review, I am NOT going to regret DNF-ing this book, because people said the story still hasn’t ended in the 15th book. GOODNESS.
Where in the world did I get this book from, anyway? I honestly cannot remember. Must be one of those free amazon deals. EEEEH.