I love you all. I have written many times on how the book community has actually helped mold me into a better person. I’m a lot more mature and open to different views. I no longer believe a disagreement is a personal insult. I am more aware and sensitive to social injustice. The blogging community gets a lot of heat, but there are a TON of good things that outweigh the bad things.
I have become so comfortable with the mature* –
-atmosphere, that I often forget that there are others that are, let’s say, less bookishly evolved than us. Sadly, Goodreads and the internet still have its fair share of readers that are of the old mindset. I’ve been monitoring a few reviews on GR that have attracted the heathen readers, who shake their sticks and hurl rocks at those who dare to disagree with them. For the sake of research, I have compiled a list of things to do when someone does not like your favorite book, medieval-style.
Get Angry. Very, Very Angry.
Like, you need to get FURIOUS. Use caps and a lot of exclamation points. Don’t even pay attention to your grammar – the message will be very clear. “YOU ARE WRONG, H8R.” If you are not unhinged with pure rage, then how are you going to defend your beloved book and smite this mean person? They’re only giving the book one star because of RATINGS.
Insult Anything and Everything.
Target, check. Anger, check. Disillusions that you are the only correct person on the site, check.
You see that 1-star rating and you are foaming at the mouth. You’re ready for book battle! Go get ’em, tiger!
First, you have to prepare for your eye-opening rant. Go to the reviewer’s profile and get everything you can about the person. Now you are armed for the war! Time to go teach that bully a lesson!
Find the review again. More than likely it has a lot of likes. People are so MEAN! And if anyone else agrees with this h8r, tell them that they need to make up their own minds and read the book for themselves! These people didn’t make an informed decision! They need to hear from YOU before they make their own decisions!
Declare War on This H8r.
Insult their name, their gender, their overall rating, their intelligence, their dog, their friends ANYTHING to teach them a lesson. If you liked the book, then there is no way someone else has another opinion! That is not an option! There is no possible way this book can be disliked by anyone! You read it and you loved it! That other person needs to shut up and instantly know that they won’t like a book before they read it! Simple logic!
Now the mean reviewer’s friends have swooped in to try to point out the error of your ways. Whatever. These are sock puppet accounts by that h8r. Start napalming the thread. You could do this all day. You need that review to come down. Difference of opinion? No such thing! A thoughtful, well-explained review does NOT MAKE UP FOR THE FACT THAT THEY RATED THE BOOK WITH ONE STAR! YOU WILL FIGHT THEM ALL TO THE DEATH.
Post The Same Reply Several Times.
They’ll get the point! Lob your insults, I mean, your wisdom at those trolls like this is D-Day! Repetition is the key here! They just keep COMING! “Respect” and “logic” have no place here in the foxholes of reading! That one star reviewer is going DOWN. Don’t forget to try to belittle someone’s reply. You know what is and isn’t a good book. No one else does, except for the people that agree with you.
Make A Few New Friends. And By Friends, I Mean Sock Puppets.
That h8r blocked you! They are taking away your freedom of speech! You are silenced! Time for our good friends at Hotmail to help out. Adding a few numerals to the end of your name, and voila! You can continue the fight! Also, when you sign back up for the book site, make sure you use a foreign country as the location. That will throw them off!
Return to the Battlefield.
HERE WE COME!
Get Bored, or Smarter, or Both.
Now you’re sick of making all of those accounts and fighting with all of those haters. You used the “friends” you made to rate the book with 10 or so 5-star ratings. That will show them.
You get an e-mail.
Sadly, your sock puppets have been reported for violation of service.
No one respects your freedom of religion and the first, or second, or third (you often forget) amendment! This is against the LAW!!!1!!one!
You go back and delete as many comments as you can from the thread because that stupid circle keeps popping up in the corner, and it seems that the mean old hag reviewer has made a lot more sock puppets, because there are pages upon pages where people are saying you are wrong. For attacking a person. When they deserved it! That is so unfair.
Leave one last comment and make it passive aggressive: “Whatever, have a good life. bye.”
There, mission accomplished!
See the Light – Come to Our Side. We Have Kitten Pictures and Boob Jokes!
Many of us have had our voices attempted to be silenced, diminished or mocked. Reading and then sharing your thoughts is such a wonderful experience, but as with many things in life, there are always a handful that want to ruin it for everyone. Luckily, this type of interaction makes up a small part of hobby reviewing, but it can sap you emotionally and bring down your spirits.
The booksphere is very rich with diversity, and there are so many great reviews of books, positive and negative. A positive review is so fun to read when the reviewer posts gifs and all-caps words. A low-starred rating can turn into a discussion or point out problems that might have been missed the first time around. A mix of high and low ratings can drum up more publicity for a book than a whole slew of positive reviews.
For those of you who face this type of person every day, know that there are those who will support you. Grab a friend, have a Twitter conversation, and keep your heads held high. We’re always here, just a Twitter handle away, ready to embrace you and tell you how much you are loved.
Because you are all awesome.
Have you had a bad experience with other people on a book site? How do you handle a misguided message about your reviews? How has the book community helped you grow?