I was in the mood to rant and snark a bit this week. I haven’t written a really negative review in a while because I have been heavily DNFing in an attempt to get caught up with my review books before BEA. It’s not exactly working. But I did want to be a little bit negative today (I’ll admit it), and so I thought I would channel that negativity into this week’s topic: characters I can’t stand.
Now, admittedly, there are a lot of those. Characters either make or break a novel for me. Usually. Once in a blue moon I can look past it because the plot is fuckawesome. But that’s like a rare occurrence. Most of the characters I chose were from books I read recently, because I didn’t want to pick the same characters everyone always picks. So anyway, here is the list:
Celaena Sardothien (The Throne of Glass series by Sarah J. Maas) – Everything about her rubs me the wrong way. Self-bloated, shit-talking, and a sorry excuse for a female lead role, I cannot understand the fascination with her by every male character in the book. I wanted to rip out every golden hair from her empty head by the end of the first novel.
Edward Cullen (The Twilight series by Stephanie Meyer) – This guy ruined vampires, and caused a whole new subculture of asshole boyfriends to pop up in YA fiction. I usually add Bella to my list of more spited characters, but Edward deserves his own spot as well. He is disgusting, end of story.
Tris Prior (The Divergent series by Veronica Roth) – This one was a toss up between Four and Tris. In the first book, I adored Tris, but the second book wiped out any and all respect for the character. Martyrs do not score well in my book, and her sneaky, butt-hurt attitude caused me to loathe her by the end of the second book. My hopes for book 3 are not high.
Alaska Young (Looking for Alaska by John Green) – Oh, I hate this character. I hate the archetypal female role of “snotty-ass bitch”. Girls who play with other’s feelings and use the people around her as pawns make me want to froth up blood. I hated her every minute of the book, so the entire novel was lost on me by the end of the book. Good riddance.
Lugh (The Dust Land series by Moira Young) – HAHA KARA! I have a special place for this character on my list. No one, not one single character, has ever matched my utter spiteful raging HATE. The number one spot will always belong to Lugh. I want this character to die the most horrible death ever. I want to see him shredded and burned and then brought back to life to start all over again. Kara’s note: Yes!! Let’s cut him into little pieces, run him down the garbage disposal, reconstruct him and raise him as a zombie, and kick him in the balls right next to a bonfire so he falls in and dies a fiery death, disintegrating to ash.